I follow Today Parent on Facebook and an article came through my news feed last night that I felt like I had to read. It was titled, “What Happens When Someone Tells You That You Have Cancer“. My story isn’t that different than the one in that article. It’s not something that I will forget. I was a Mom and that was coming first. I couldn’t just go home and cry my eyes out and curl in a ball. I had to go home and take care of newborn child. I even had my daughter with me when I found out the news. My husband, daughter and I went home following the news from the doctor. She still needed to eat, her diaper changed and rocked.
Then I called my Mom and I told her that she needed to come over right away. I didn’t tell her over the phone but I imagine a lot was racing through her head, but I am sure “cancer” wasn’t something that she was thinking of. We told her what the doctor said and asked her to share the news with my Dad and Brother. I couldn’t bare sharing that news in person with them. It was hard enough having to tell my Mom something like this. I just kept picturing my daughter telling me that same news and how devastated I would’ve been. My Mom she was amazing though she held it together, she was my Mom and did everything I needed her to do as my Mom. We then made the trip to my in-laws to tell them the news. We stood in their kitchen, I was holding my daughter in my arms. I began by saying remember when the doctors were talking about the cyst they found during the c-section, well it came back as cancer. Sharing news like is never easy I will never forget those moments of watching you turn someones life upside down. I wish I was done having to tell people at that moment about the diagnosis but then you realize how many people are part of your life. There were still friends and colleagues that I needed to tell.
We went back home and this time I just slept and I slept. My husband took care of our daughter and I just slept. By sleeping I could dream of amazing things. I wasn’t having to deal with the reality that I had cancer and that I didn’t know how bad it could possibly be. Being awake was horrible to me, sleeping was what made everything better. However, I still needed to get up for night feedings for my daughter.
Thankfully the next morning at 8am my doctor gave me reassuring news that they had good margins from when my doctor removed the cyst from my ovary during the c-section. That night I had my scans done and by the following morning I knew that there was no cancer in me. I am thankful for my amazing doctors who worked on their day off and constantly reassured me everything was okay. I was fortunate enough that I only had to live two days thinking cancer was in me. I am thankful for the quick turnaround the hospital did in getting my insurance approved and my scans processed the same day. I know not everyone is so fortunate but I am very thankful for all the hard work that everyone put in for me that day. I know it goes beyond the doctors, I know it goes to the schedulers, the admin clerks, the processors, the technicians, the insurance claimers, who all worked very hard in a short period of time for me and my family. I am extremely thankful to all of you!
Just finished another 5K in Essex this past weekend. Money raised helped support a local basketball team. I didn’t train nearly enough but I still managed to do well. I completed the 5K in 30:38. Not too bad considering the sizes of the hills and that the entire course was all hills. The weather was also horrible it rained right up until the last minute. It made the air muggy and the air felt heavy. I got a real good sweat out of this one. I had a great cheering group and also ran with some of my colleagues. It felt awesome to get out and run again.
I always feel great after a run. I love that my family comes and cheers me on no matter how big or how small the race is. I love coming in faster than people expect me to. Nothing is better than waking up sore the next day.
I am hoping to find another 5K race to compete in again soon. I guess I better start looking for more. Until then I will just keep on running one day at time. Enjoying a new passion of mine!
Last night my Young Cancer Survivor group had the opportunity to go out onto Lake Champlain and paddle with Dragonheart Vermont. We went out on Lake Champlain for an hour just paddling around. This is a group of individuals who range in age from 18-40 who are all cancer survivors. Some have even beaten cancer twice! Some were diagnosed and survived years ago and then there are others who are newer like myself. It was a great opportunity to meet other survivors, as Dragonheart is made up of breast cancer survivors.
I am extremely happy to fundraising to help support Dragonheart’s mission. “The members of Dragonheart Vermont strive to promote breast cancer awareness in our community, to rovide hope to other cancer survivors and their families to live each moment fully, and to support our own team members in a spirit of camaraderie and joy,“ (dragonheartvermont.org, 2017). Although I am not a breast cancer survivor I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer, Dragonheart supports all local cancer survivors. Many of the programs I’ve utilized in my recovery were sponsored by the money raised by Dragonheart.
I am organizing a dragon boat team to paddle in the Lake Champlain Dragon Boat Festival. By clicking this link it will bring you to my fundraising page. The Lake Champlain Dragon Boat Festival supports cancer survivors just like myself. It is a great organization and a great cause.
I’ve met some amazing people through the Young Cancer Survivor group. We’re all different and we all need support in our different ways. It felt amazing to be out on the water last night. I am looking forward to being able to do it again soon!
I did it! I finished the race. I crushed my training time and managed to run all 3.4 miles. It was the most amazing experience.
As I started to cross the start line of the race. The music was blaring and the crowds were cheering. I could here the announcer in the background. As I started on with the race my emotions started to get the best of me. It was the feeling of accomplishment. It was only sixteen months ago that I had been diagnosed with ovarian cancer. I had beaten cancer, I had raised my daughter and now I was running on a relay team in the Vermont City Marathon. I had accomplished so much. It felt like I had closed a chapter in my life. As I continued running I realized that I need to focus, so I took one deep breathe let it out and started putting one foot in front of the other.
I took the corner onto Pearl Street and the crowds were still cheering. My friend Holly told me to get moving, and well that’s when it all started to sync in. I was watching the crowds, reading the signs along the way. My speed started to increase. I made it to South Willard Street, I took that corner and my speed continued to move. I was suddenly passing other runners on the course. I was improving my performance as I went up hill. I finally reached the top and made my way down Beech Street. Up next was South Union. At that point the crowds were dying down and I was already past the two mile checkpoint. I plugged in my headphones and let the music blare. I saw two kids on my right with the hands out looking for high-fives. I made my way over to them, there faces lit up as I put out my hand for them. Then I suddenly at the corner of Main Street. I know my husband and daughter were not that much far away. I couldn’t wait to see them in the crowds. I picked up my pace once again. However, I completely forgot that Church Street is up hill. Thank goodness my cheering crowd was at the top of the hill. Seeing them was the motivation I needed to keep my feet moving. I saw them in the distance. I yelled to them and they waved back and cheered. Once I passed them I knew I wasn’t too far from the finish line. I kept running I knew the exchange point for the relay wasn’t too far away. I made my last corner and was coming down Park Street. I could hear someone yelling my name and the next thing I know I see my relay teammate jumping up and down. I hand him the bracelet cheer him on and realize I am done. I had finished the race!
There was nothing more amazing than having my seventeen month old daughter watching me run in a race. I was showing her that we can do whatever we put our minds to. We can be strong and powerful when we want to be. Running has been great for me. It has given me so much. It always amazes me how much we can all accomplish if we just have the confidence to do it.